I am Hobart, and I am an Alcoholic

I am Hobart, and I am an alcoholic. I am also a homosexual who is currently coming to terms with a particularly juicy slice of the insane life I led when I first arrived in New York City in the early 1990s. Years later, in 2006, I would crash, burn, hit rock bottom and eventually […]

Love’s Illusions I Recall

Jay Gatsby became the man he believed Daisy Buchannan could love. Perhaps otherwise content to live a life of middling aspiration, he hustled – with legendary parties, crooked cash and fancy cars – until he’d built around himself a mythic gravity, sufficient, he hoped, to pull West Egg across the water. Did he do all […]

The Cuddler

Yes, I Paid a Woman to Cuddle With Me In my mind’s eye, I am backstage behind a curtain while Oprah tells her studio audience they are about to meet a man who paid a woman to cuddle with him. Her announcement is met with gasps, skeptical laughter, and facial expressions betraying attempts to wrap […]

Why I Abandoned Desire

  So, did sex happen? my friend asks over the phone. I relay a memory involving an old boyfriend from high school. Frozen, I have no idea what to say. Um, well. I breathe into the phone. We didn’t, actually, go all the way. What do you mean? she asks. I trust my friend. We […]

Christmas Vacation in the Schizophrenia Factory

“…what is usually called hypnosis is an experimental model of a naturally occurring phenomenon in many families. In the family situation, however, the hypnotists (the parents) are already hypnotized (by their parents) and are carrying out their instructions, by bringing their children up to bring their children up… I consider that the majority of adults […]